It’s my mother’s birthday today.
There are so many things to say about her. She carries so much strength within. I wonder if I can be anything like her but then I remember, I am one of her life’s miracle and I carry the genes of great women. One day, I’ll write about her courage, her independence, her struggle, her zeal to become relevant in a place that had chocked her for long. And I’ll pass across to my daughters and young girls around me one of the important things I’ve learnt from being the daughter of my mother – YOUNG GIRLS SHOULD NOT INHERIT THE SILENCE OF THEIR MOTHERS; THAT THE SILENCE OF MOTHERS SHOULD NOT BE PASSED UNTO THEIR DAUGHTERS.   One day I’ll write about it all. 

But today I want to write about the mummy that bought us ROYAL INDOMIE because “Buharinomics”.  

While at home, I noticed that my mum had bought a different kind of indomie. It is important to know that in Nigeria, every noodle is known as Indomie even though those other noodles have their own names; like the one my mum bought – ROYAL NOODLES aka ROYAL INDOMIE! 

After cooking it, I didn’t like it. It had a different taste and had a “thin” look. I complained and trust the average mother : “IT IS VERY CHEAP” she said “and if you’re not going to eat it go and buy your own type of INDOMIE!” The owner of the kitchen had spoken. That’s how bad things are now in this country. A carton of the smallest size of indomie instant noodles now goes for #1,750 and super pack size goes for #2000. Who would have thought that this day would come? 

If you’ve read Fine Boys by Eghosa Imasuen, you would remember the scene where the boys sat down and imagined the day a bottle of beer would be sold for #100. Laughing my ass off. If only they knew.   

Knowing fully well that things are now very difficult, I decided to look for the cheapest things in the market. 

I went to the market and said to the woman I bought my provisions from; “Aunty, please give me your cheapest milk”. I had to ask her o. Cos I can’t afford to buy PEAK milk of #900. She gave me this milk called “POPULAR” and I got it for #450. My people, this is what I’ll be taking now. It’s no different from the others and IT IS CHEAPER! 

I also found an alternative to the monopoly that is St.Louis Sugar.

I remember seeing the sugar at home. I asked my siblings how much it was and they said #250. It was a fair price, seeing as St. Louis now goes for #350 – who would have thought this day would come? Anyways, I was happy that St. Louis had a replacement and when mum gave me provisions for school I went to the aboki man near my house and told him I wanted the new type of sugar. This man told me #300. I was confused, wasn’t it #250 anymore? I went home and told my sisters, they laughed at me. They said he had cheated me and that it was Aunty Osa that sells hers for #250. My people! Because hard economy, I went ad returned sugar to the aboki. I bought #200 credit instead and finally bought the sugar for #250.  

Do not blame me. 

Anyways, once I’m done with this sugar I’ll migrate to using granulated Dangote sugar. I heard it’s cheaper.  

Before I came back to school, My mother found this cheap market somewhere in Portharcourt – TOWN MARKET! She has decided to be going there once a month. Once she’s paid, she’ll take a certain lump sum and stuck for the month. Only I wish I was at home to relieve her of the stress. 

I admire her strength. 

I just want to cry from thinking of everything she’s been through and how she’s managed to overcome. 

I carry the genes of great women in me. Of her and the women before her. I know this, because I see the spark in her eyes when she talks about her mother and her grandmother and her sisters. 

I love you My Mummy! 

I call her NKEMAKOLAM. 


Love and Sunshine!